Category: Family

Why should I thank my ancestors?

Pamela, Many cultures, especially the Asian and Native American traditions, are grounded in reverence for their ancestors. These cultures are keenly aware that it is only through the sacrifice, choices, and experiences of thousands of years of ancestors that we sit here today. We are the highest expression of our gene pool because we have…
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Why are family secrets harmful?

Joseph, Family secrets are family lies. Dishonesty is not just what one says verbally, but also what is held in silence. I have always lived by the statement “Secrets kill and the truth heals.” A family secret is like a hidden ticking bomb just waiting to explode. The family constructs a life around the impending…
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What is shunning?

Lia, Shunning is an ancient practice that is still used today in many cultures, and humans have an innate fear of it. When a member of any group disagrees with the norms or the values of the family, the family may expel that person from the group. The Amish and other religions use this practice…
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Why might I be afraid of being shunned by my family?

Diana, One of the greatest fears of a family member is shunning. Shunning is an ancient practice where a member of any group disagrees with the norms or the values of the family, the family may expel that person from the group. When a family lives with secrets or dishonesty, most of us will stay…
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How can I develop an honest relationship with my family?

Juliette, There are simple ways to help develop honesty in your family. Research continues to reveal the positive psychological virtues fostered by simply eating dinner together as a family. You create a forum for the cultivation of honesty and vulnerability when you take the time and commitment to celebrate food and share stories with each…
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How can I find joy in my community?

Maggie, The neighborhood you live in can be a source of great joy. People love to organize communities around different needs and interests. Please take the time to explore your passions, and then reach out to find people with common interests. You can discover a new family in community. There are infinite possibilities for healing…
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How can I make sure my family has happy holidays?

Lilly, Holidays are occasions that instill optimism in a family. No matter what happens in a family during the years — deaths, divorces, arguments, or estrangements — holidays create the opportunity for hope, new beginnings, and healing. Don’t allow holidays to become stale and rote. Weave new traditions into the fabric of your holiday rituals.…
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Is optimism genetic?

Elliott, Science tells us that optimism is actually a component of our deoxyribonucleic acid (DNA). You can look back to your ancestors and see the imprints of optimism. About half of your optimism comes from your DNA and half comes from your environment. But if you weren’t born with optimistic DNA or didn’t receive doses…
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How can money affect my relationship with my partner?

Kyle, The first wound in a relationship usually involves finances. This is where fear, anxiety; anger, and depression can begin to plague two people in a committed partnership. The myth that two people can live as cheaply as one persists. That almost never happens. Whatever you do, don’t wait until after you are married to…
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How can I encourage my children to be optimistic?

Nicole, Optimism in a family is rooted in the parents. The parents set the stage on which the drama of family unfolds. If you think about any family right now you admire, the parents and siblings are cheerleaders for each other. You have to be able to convey that optimistic hope to one another in…
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